About Me

What is normalizing trans existence?

It's the simple act of sharing my life, really. I talk about what I'm making for dinner, what my kids are interested in, etc. Talking about my life as a trans person allows people to see the reality--that we are normal people leading normal lives. I've gotten a plethora of messages, comments, emails, etc. from people that admitted they were transphobic until they saw my content. They were given a real life example of what a trans person was life, and with that they were able to combat the way the media makes trans people out to be. 

Why is this important to me?

This might be a long one, so buckle up!

I came out when I was 14 years old, and nobody knew what trans was. My family wasn't exactly supportive; though they began to be about 5 years into my transition. I found community online, where some of those friends I made are still in contact today! There wasn’t much transmasc representation in the media, and I had no clue what adult life would look like for me! I didn’t think that marriage and children were an option for me, but boy am I glad I was wrong! Part of the reason I share my story is to build that reality that trans people exist, we're not scary, and we lead pretty normal lives. 

I’ve always been active on social media, but I didn’t truly understand the ramifications until I was pregnant with my first child. I shared my life to inspire others, but I quickly found my pregnancy pictures being stolen and circulated on fetish sites. During that time, I also gained a stalker - which was scary! I started college around then and was the only open trans person in any of my classes. Throughout my second pregnancy, I only shared pregnancy updates and pictures with family. 

With my third pregnancy, I had no plans to announce to the world until the baby was born! But, I ended up announcing because of the surplus of anti-trans legislation. I wanted to share my trans joy during a difficult time for our community. Shortly after that, almost halfway through my pregnancy, I made a TikTok for my 5 friends ranting about how my midwife was closing their clinic. I was angry, scared, and just needed to vent. My first two children had been early (37 weeks) and I had no idea if my third would be the same! I graduated with a 4.0, suma cum laude, for my bachelor's in early childhood education with a focus on atypical development around this time. 

That one TikTok went viral. Suddenly, I had a large platform and thousands of people eagerly awaiting the arrival of my third baby! I got the opportunity to educate MILLIONS of people! There were tons of people who related to me being pregnant, living in a trailer park, and staying home with my two children. This opened up a bit of normalizing trans existence.

I won’t lie, it was difficult mentally. It was exhausting to go through and delete and block so many people. The number of comments I got from people saying my kids needed to be taken away, I was an abomination, etc. etc. almost equaled the amount of support I got. Though those hateful messages were difficult to deal with; I knew that I was doing something good by being vocal. 

People claimed I was faking my pregnancy and that I had a fake baby! Still crazy to me!! I often wonder if they think about me, and if they still think I was faking.

Once the baby was born; postpartum, the current standing of the world, a family emergency, the hate, and the pressure to push out content had me taking an extended break from social media. 

My husband, 3 kids, 3 cats, and I sold our home and moved 500 miles! It was a rough move, but I’m glad we moved to support my FIL. We now live in a multigenerational home, which is a lot of fun!! 

Then I began my author journey, which will eventually add a whole new ramble here about that. 

Love you all!

Max